An interview with Cynthia Jan Robinson (aka my mum)
As some of you will know I've recently decided to pursue my dream of becoming a writer, and one of the things that was on my list was to interview a family member, and so here it is. My mum kindly agreed to be my first subject. Thank you mum!
Enjoy!
My mum at her surprise 60th birthday party, January 2016.
Again at mum's 60th birthday party.
Back: Uncle Ivan, Auntie Rachel, Auntie Lynda
Front: Cynthia
Auntie Patricia (sadly passed away in 2015)
My mum, Cynthia, is the best mum in the whole world. I'm biased I know, but it's true. My mum is the star of this blog, and she was a delight to interview. I'm always eager to hear all the interesting and funny stories from her life, so I hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed hearing it.
- It's not until you get older you think 'Actually, I'm as good as anybody else'.
- So the policeman came out the shop and took my name and everything, followed me home, and the first thing he did when he got in the front room was to comb his hair.
- You can send somebody a text and then they say 'Oh, well I didn't get it till later on'. Well where's it been then?!
When and where were you born?
I was born on 11th January 1956 at Glentham, a little village not far from Lincoln. We actually went there a few years back to find the house we lived at and it's no longer there. It's been redeveloped.
I was the only child born at home. That's when we had the first television apparently, because the midwife spent more time looking at the television then she did seeing to me and my mum.
So tell me about the line up of where you came in your siblings.
Well, Patricia was born in 1952. Lynda was born in 1954. I was born in 1956, so I was in the middle. I've got a younger brother Ivan, born 1958, and then Rachel, the youngest. She came in 1964.
Tell me about your parents.
My dad was a communist. He wanted a fair crack of the whip for everybody. He thought everybody should be equal. He was a union leader at some point. He was a stern man. He wasn't nasty or anything, but you should respect your parents, and everything.
My mum just plodded on and looked after us the best she could, in a very good way. She was a brick. She was the staying power really. Although she didn't work, she had us lot and looking after five children there's not a lot of space left to work. Me and my mum once went onto a local field and collected beetroot for a few extra pennies. I got 50 pence. She never really shouted, she would sing. I remember her singing if things got too boisterous. She would sing 'Tell me the same old story', which was a hymn.
They looked after us really well. I never felt neglected, although we didn't have a lot. We didn't have a lot of surplus cash. We didn't have exotic holidays. We went to my Auntie's in Wales on the farm. My dad used to work with my Uncle Geoffrey, and we used to sometimes shell peas for my Auntie.
And your Auntie, who was she related to?
That's my dad's younger sister, who were twin sisters, her and her sister. Their dad had died when they were probably about 6 months. Their mum had died a few months earlier, and then their dad died, they say of a broken heart, but we don't think it's that now. We think he had pneumonia. So they were all farmed out. My dad was one of six and they were all farmed out to different aunties to be looked after. My dad was looked after by two maiden aunts who lived together.
He was learning the cornet. He used to have to go to the shed to learn it because they didn't like him to play it in the house. Then he ran off in the navy when he was old enough. Well before he was old enough. He faked his age, which you could do easily in them days, and joined the Navy. Luckily he survived.
He was learning the cornet. He used to have to go to the shed to learn it because they didn't like him to play it in the house. Then he ran off in the navy when he was old enough. Well before he was old enough. He faked his age, which you could do easily in them days, and joined the Navy. Luckily he survived.
So where does Grandma fit into all of this? Where did they meet?
Well my mum and dad are cousins. My mum's mum and my dad's mum were sisters. They'd always known of each other because they were cousins. Although my dad lived in Wales and my mum lived in Grimsby. So they used to meet up occasionally and just fell in love. At one point they called the engagement off because they didn't think it was right that cousins should marry. I've got all the letters that my mum and dad sent to each other during their courtship. At one point my dad calls it off, I’ve got the letter. But obviously they got back together again. My granddad on my mum’s side didn't like the fact that he was a communist, and he sent him a letter, a strongly worded letter. But anyway they got over that and they married.
And they had a long happy life...
Yes. I think they had their moments, but they never argued in front of us. I didn't think they ever argued. But my mum said, 'Oh we did, but we always used to wait until you'd gone to bed'.
My dad wouldn't have anything on tick. It sometimes annoyed my mum, but he wouldn't. He'd save up and get it. So that's just the way he was, and he didn't want to get in debt, which is good really, not to get in debt.
We always went to school clean and tidy. Always had Christmas. We had a nice Christmas. I never ever felt neglected, or anything like that. We always had plenty to eat. In fact too much to eat because I always used to be fat, and I still am (laughs). So I wasn't starved. So we always had food on the table, a clean house. A bit cold when I was small. We used to have ice inside of the bedroom windows, and when it used to get really cold we used to put the coats on the beds as well. In them days it wasn't quilts, it was blankets. Sheets and blankets. So it was pretty cold. But my mum, in the winter months, always used to get up really early, and light the coal fire downstairs. And we always used to get dressed in front of the fire. So you know, she always did that. So she was a good mum.
So you've talked about what your parents did for a living. What other jobs did your dad do during his life?
After the Navy he worked on farms. He was a milkman basically, milked the cows. He was a coal man for a time. He was a dustman for a time. He couldn't seem to get the right breaks to get a better job, and that's why he always said to my brother, ‘Get a good education'. He wanted a better life for him then he had. Then he was a car park attendant before he died. So he didn't have the best of jobs. I think he'd of liked to have had more money to supply more things, but as I said, I never felted neglected at all.
We always had good dinners. We didn't have a lot, which we didn't in them days. We didn't have loads of presents. We had an annual, some sweets, chocolates, an apple and an orange. We always got those in our sock. And a toy of some sort. Our aunties used to buy us something. We had a pair of pajamas as well. I think they knew pajamas were the fact that, you know, you'd go to bed early Christmas night. So yeah, I never felt neglected or unhappy or anything.
Did your mum have any jobs?
No. Well, she was in the ATS during the war. Her dad had a news agents. I think she helped him out in the news agents before she married, taking the papers out.
It's a full-time job isn't it, looking after kids and the house.
Well that's it, once you start having children. She had four of us; one every two years. So when she had the second one, the first one would only be two, so you've got your hands full haven't you? Rachel was a bit later coming. I'm nine years older then her, so she'd be fifty one.
Did you contribute to the family income, or the housework in any way?
When I got my first job, I worked at a place called Lamsen Paragon and they made business forms. In the olden days when you used to have a bank card, you used to put it on this machine with the booklet, which had like grease proof paper, and then it had carbon paper in between. You’d put your card on and one of those on top, and slide this thing across and take all the details off. We used to make them forms there. My first week's wage was £10, which was considered a really good wage. When the other two girls, who were older than me, had their first job they was allowed to keep their first week's wage all to themselves. But when I started, because I had such a good wage of £10, I had to pay so much the first week. I don't know how much I paid. £2, £3 maybe. But I just paid the lodge, I didn't help out really in any other way.
I had driving lessons, which then they were only £2. £2! Then I passed my test when I was eighteen. I got a little car. I liked to drive because my granddad had a car. We never had a car. My dad tried to take a test, but he never passed because he didn't have lessons. That's probably why. We couldn't have really afforded a car anyway. My granddad drove, and I always used to go with him in his car when we went over. I thought I'd love to learn to drive, so I did as soon as I could. I got a little car. So that was nice.
What was your first car?
It was a black Volkswagen Beetle. OFL 705. I don't know how I still remember that but I do. Then I had an accident. I dropped somebody off from work once, and parked behind a police car where these shops were, and dropped this woman off. I didn't see anybody behind me and I pulled out and a car came and ripped my front wing off. So the policeman come out the shop and took my name and everything, followed me home, and first thing he did when he got in the front room was to comb his hair in front of mirror. I thought 'How arrogant'. But anyway, I got a few points on my license. Apart from that and going through a red light at a junction, it's the only offence I've had.
So what was your granddad like?
I didn't see him very often. He was bald apart from a horse shoe shape of hair around the back of his head. But I used to spend hours combing his hair when I was little. I was only about nine or ten when he died. But he alright. He was a boxer apparently when he was younger. Not as a profession but as a hobby.
All his family were farmers. My grandma and granddad had had a farm, which they rented off somebody. It'd been a bad couple of years and he hadn't paid enough rent or something. I don’t really know the ins and outs, but the crops were in the field. It was a good crop this particular year, but the farmer who owned the farm said ‘I want the rent or you have to get out’. My granddad said ‘If you just wait for the crops to come I can pay you'. But he wouldn't wait. So he chucked them out, which was horrible. And so they went to live with her sister and her husband for a while until they could find their own place.
My grandma was a very prudish woman. After my granddad had died, my grandma was living with us and my uncle came to stay. We'd all got ready for bed in thick pajamas, so you could only see your face and your hands and your feet. We came in and gave our uncle a kiss on the cheek goodnight and my grandma was quite put out, saying 'I'm going to get dressed in the proper place'. She thought it was disgusting that we gave our uncle a kiss on the cheek in our nightwear, that's how prudish she was.
What was your parents religious background?
Neither was particularly religious. My mum never went to church, only weddings and funerals. They got married in a register office. But no, my mum and dad weren't particularly religious. She had a wonderful singing voice my mum, but she never joined a choir or anything because she was too busy looking after us, which was a shame.
My mum's brother was very religious, but he didn't shove it in your face. He was a very kind, very gentle man.
What were your parents political beliefs?
Well I don't think my mum had any particular political beliefs. My dad was a communist. There's a story about him one night, he'd gone out, which he didn't normally go out, and these men in black came. Sounds like a film doesn't it? I never saw them. I think my eldest sister had seen them. They came quite late on at night: 9, 10 o’clock or something. They sat and waited nearly all night for my dad to come in but he never did. So eventually they cleared off. Apparently they did used to keep their eye on people that were communists in case they were involved in anything a bit dodgy, which my dad wasn't. I think he gave it up in the latter stage of his life. I know he used to get the morning star for years and years and years and years. I know he used to have a picture of John Lennon...not John Lennon, of Lennon (giggles). Different Lennon. Anyway, we used to have a picture of him on the wall. My dad had framed it. If anybody came to the house, my mum used to cover it up with a shirt on a coat hanger, or whatever she could find. I’m not politically minded at all. But I know he wanted the best for everybody. Everybody should be treated the same, that was just the way he was. He wouldn't do anybody any harm at all. He just had his beliefs.
What other relatives did you have contact with growing up?
Well there was my grandma and granddad. They died when I was about nine or ten. My auntie and uncle, that's my mum’s auntie. Auntie Norma and Uncle John, they used to come see us a few times a year. My Auntie Betty, that's my cousin Sandra's mum, and Uncle Geoffrey, they used to come maybe once a year. We used to have holidays at their farm and fetch the cows in, shell peas and walk up and down the hills. It was really nice.
My Uncle Ted, who was my dad's eldest brother, he had a different father then the rest of them and was the only one that liked a drink, so he was inebriated a lot of the time. But he was the one that outlived everybody. He was the eldest and he was the last one to go. So it probably preserved him more than the rest of them.
My Auntie Aggie, which was my grandma’s sister, was the one that looked after Sandra's mum, her twin sister, when their mum and dad died. My dad's mum and dad died within a few months of each other. I think she died of consumption and he died a few months later. So all the kids had to be farmed out. So the twin sister girls, who were only a few months old, my Auntie Aggie looked after them. Sandra's mum eventually married and had Sandra. The other sister, Auntie Nancy, never married. She just stayed with her mum until she died. She lived in the same house all her life.
My Auntie Ruth and Uncle Steven, that was my dad's brother, never had children. He died in about 1975. I think he had angina. I think a lot of them had heart trouble, scarily. His other brothers and sisters had gone by the time we were old enough to know them really. So that was it. Uncle Steven and Auntie Ruth lived in Wales with Sandra’s mum and dad. Uncle Ted, the older one, he lived near Chester. And that's it really.
I've still got cousins. My mum's brother, he had four girls, so we still keep in touch with them. There was distant relatives. Uncle Edward, who was a cousin on my uncle Geoffrey's side. He had a farm, anyway, he's long been gone. I remember going to his house when his mum was alive. He never married either. He stayed with his mum. I remember going once and having like a buffet tea at their house. But I don't think I saw much of him. He died soon after his mum died, so he didn't last long. As we've grown up, everybody's dying off, which is what tends to happen.
My Uncle Ted, who was my dad's eldest brother, he had a different father then the rest of them and was the only one that liked a drink, so he was inebriated a lot of the time. But he was the one that outlived everybody. He was the eldest and he was the last one to go. So it probably preserved him more than the rest of them.
My Auntie Aggie, which was my grandma’s sister, was the one that looked after Sandra's mum, her twin sister, when their mum and dad died. My dad's mum and dad died within a few months of each other. I think she died of consumption and he died a few months later. So all the kids had to be farmed out. So the twin sister girls, who were only a few months old, my Auntie Aggie looked after them. Sandra's mum eventually married and had Sandra. The other sister, Auntie Nancy, never married. She just stayed with her mum until she died. She lived in the same house all her life.
My Auntie Ruth and Uncle Steven, that was my dad's brother, never had children. He died in about 1975. I think he had angina. I think a lot of them had heart trouble, scarily. His other brothers and sisters had gone by the time we were old enough to know them really. So that was it. Uncle Steven and Auntie Ruth lived in Wales with Sandra’s mum and dad. Uncle Ted, the older one, he lived near Chester. And that's it really.
I've still got cousins. My mum's brother, he had four girls, so we still keep in touch with them. There was distant relatives. Uncle Edward, who was a cousin on my uncle Geoffrey's side. He had a farm, anyway, he's long been gone. I remember going to his house when his mum was alive. He never married either. He stayed with his mum. I remember going once and having like a buffet tea at their house. But I don't think I saw much of him. He died soon after his mum died, so he didn't last long. As we've grown up, everybody's dying off, which is what tends to happen.
What stories did you hear about earlier ancestors whom you never knew? Did your mum or granddad or anybody ever talk about anyone, like their parents?
I remember my dad saying about my Uncle Steve, cause he was in the navy as well, that he was given a note to give to Winston Churchill. They said to him 'You have to give it to Winston Churchill, not anybody else'. He eventually found Winston Churchill and he gave him this note. I don't know what the note said, or whether he read it beforehand.
My granddad, my mum's dad, did some boxing. There's pictures of him actually somewhere in a boxing pose.
My granddad, my mum's dad, did some boxing. There's pictures of him actually somewhere in a boxing pose.
I suppose when you're growing up you don't ask things unless you start talking about it.
No you don't sit down. But you're so busy, even then, going out or whatever and you think that's important. You should really sit down more. It was my dad who got my Uncle Ted, my dad's oldest brother, back into the fold. He had a different father, and when his mum married my dad's father, he didn't want anything to do with my Uncle Ted. So he was sent away. But it was my dad that found him and bought him back into the fold. He had a different surname than the rest of them.
I know my mum was in the ATS. Her brother was in the army. Those doodlebugs, I think they were from Germany. There wasn't anybody in them and they were like a flying bomb. They sent them out and they would just fly over. Eventually they would get so low they would crash. My mum and my brother were walking down the road somewhere and they heard it coming. My uncle laid on top of my mum in a ditch and it crashed. It blew up quite near to them. You could hear them coming apparently. They had a whining sound so you could hear them if it was quiet.
Describe what your siblings were like when you were younger.
Pat was bossy. Pat like her own way. She would lash out at you when you were little, put you in your place.
We used to all play together. My mum used to have a drop leaf table, and we used to put blankets on it and make a tent underneath. You know sit underneath and make out it was a den, things like that. Or put a blanket over the clothesline and make a tent. We used to play with the neighbours. They had a big shed. We used to go in there and play houses. You know, as you do. We didn't really fall out. We used to, you know, do as you do, ‘He touched me', 'He touched me first', sort of thing. We got on well. I don't remember anybody really falling out.
Ivan broke his leg once. We were playing horses and Lynda, I think it was Lynda, had a skipping rope around his waist and she had a hold of the handles. He was supposed to hold the thing at his waist, but he didn’t, so it fell down and tripped him up and broke his leg. But we all got on and I don't remember any big fall outs.
I broke one of my mum's pot dogs climbing up somewhere. I don't remember doing it, but I probably just wanted to see it and climbed up.
I don't remember anybody having any serious injuries, apart from the broken leg. We've been lucky really that we're still talking to each other. We're quite close. We have the odd huffiness when you say something and you go off in a huff for a while, but nothing major. Nothing that would split us up. I think if we were going to split up, we'd have already done it. You know as you get older you mellow and you take things on the chin more.
We used to all play together. My mum used to have a drop leaf table, and we used to put blankets on it and make a tent underneath. You know sit underneath and make out it was a den, things like that. Or put a blanket over the clothesline and make a tent. We used to play with the neighbours. They had a big shed. We used to go in there and play houses. You know, as you do. We didn't really fall out. We used to, you know, do as you do, ‘He touched me', 'He touched me first', sort of thing. We got on well. I don't remember anybody really falling out.
Ivan broke his leg once. We were playing horses and Lynda, I think it was Lynda, had a skipping rope around his waist and she had a hold of the handles. He was supposed to hold the thing at his waist, but he didn’t, so it fell down and tripped him up and broke his leg. But we all got on and I don't remember any big fall outs.
I broke one of my mum's pot dogs climbing up somewhere. I don't remember doing it, but I probably just wanted to see it and climbed up.
I don't remember anybody having any serious injuries, apart from the broken leg. We've been lucky really that we're still talking to each other. We're quite close. We have the odd huffiness when you say something and you go off in a huff for a while, but nothing major. Nothing that would split us up. I think if we were going to split up, we'd have already done it. You know as you get older you mellow and you take things on the chin more.
It's not worth it is it?, falling out? And it's usually over something silly.
Well that's it. They say something you don't like and you think well maybe at the end of the day it's true. You just don't like to hear things sometimes, you know?
It's very true. It's hard to hear things sometimes.
Well that's it. If you're set in your ways and you do things that are annoying and somebody eventually tells you, you don't like it do you? But after you've had a sob, you think ‘Well maybe it's true then'.
Who are you closest to?
Well I think I'm closest to Lynda at the moment cause we've lived nearer for longer. I talk to her more than I talk to the other siblings, so I suppose I am closer to Lynda. We share more things.
Was that the same growing up?
No. We were all evenly spread really. When we all lived together we all mucked in. We all had to take our turns doing the pots and cleaning the silver. Oh my god! And the brasses. Oh my god! That's why we don't have any brasses anymore, because they need cleaning.
Describe the house you grew up in.
Well we lived, when I was younger, in a house not dissimilar to this one really. And Sycamore Street where we used to live. You walked in and the stairs were in front of you, the living room one side and the kitchen the other side. And we always had three bedrooms as far as I remember, which was a bit of a squeeze when there was four girls. But then Rachel didn't come till later, so by the time Rachel came, Pat had got married and gone. But then we had grandma, and at one point there was four of us in the big bedroom. I think that was before Pat got married. There was grandma and Pat, and me and Lynda. Me and Lynda had bunk beds and then grandma and Pat was in a double bed. But then Pat got married so my dad put a curtain up, divided the room so my grandma could have some privacy in half the room. Then we had the bunk beds in the other side. Eventually we all got married and my grandma died. So then it become really quiet. Then Rachel had the big room to herself.
Ivan got his own room.
Ivan always had the small room. Mum and dad always had the medium sized room.
It was my dad who taught me how to paper. I used to help him wallpaper, so that's how I learnt my decorating skills.
They were comfortable houses, and they were council houses. We didn't have our own house. I remember getting the first colour television. It really hurt my eyes when we first got colour television. My eyes would just water all the time. I think we just weren't used to it, having black and white and then you get colour and it was very intense. And you wasn't used to it for a while, it took a while for you to adjust yourself to colour.
It was my dad who taught me how to paper. I used to help him wallpaper, so that's how I learnt my decorating skills.
They were comfortable houses, and they were council houses. We didn't have our own house. I remember getting the first colour television. It really hurt my eyes when we first got colour television. My eyes would just water all the time. I think we just weren't used to it, having black and white and then you get colour and it was very intense. And you wasn't used to it for a while, it took a while for you to adjust yourself to colour.
What programmes did you used to watch?
Crackajack. Charlie's Angels when we were older. All the wonderful things. Andy Pandy when we were small. The wooden tops. When we were in junior school there used to put the radio on and we used to sing along. Weird really, but in them days it wasn't the same as it is now.
The teacher used to play the piano. The senior teacher, Mrs Hughson used play for the hymns in the morning. I used to start it off cause I was the only girl in the class. Mind you, there was only six of us in the junior school, but the higher level, you know, the senior ones. I was the only girl. Six or seven of us. So I used to start the hymns off. That's why I always wanted to play the piano cause I used to watch her play.
The teacher used to play the piano. The senior teacher, Mrs Hughson used play for the hymns in the morning. I used to start it off cause I was the only girl in the class. Mind you, there was only six of us in the junior school, but the higher level, you know, the senior ones. I was the only girl. Six or seven of us. So I used to start the hymns off. That's why I always wanted to play the piano cause I used to watch her play.
What activities did the family do together? What did you do on Christmas, birthdays, holidays?
We always had a birthday tea on birthdays. Family Christmas. We didn't go anywhere. We used to have days out now and then, have a trip on the bus. We used to walk up to the bus station and have a day or two at the seaside. But we didn't have holidays as such, only at my auntie’s farm. We used to just play around the house with the neighbours.
I know once I got some friends in, when I was probably a teenager, and decided to do that Ouija thing, you know, when you put the letters around in a circle and you all put your fingers on this glass. Then my dad came in once with a bucket or a tray or something and a wooden spoon, banging it. Scared us.
I know once I got some friends in, when I was probably a teenager, and decided to do that Ouija thing, you know, when you put the letters around in a circle and you all put your fingers on this glass. Then my dad came in once with a bucket or a tray or something and a wooden spoon, banging it. Scared us.
Did he not believe in that sort of thing?
No. So we didn't do it anymore.
What about your mum, did she believe in ghosts?
No. No. We never even talked about it. We never talked about ghosts or anything. She said that her dad had seen a white horse gallop down the road in silence once. A phantom ghost she said, phantom horse. It just galloped past with no sound. But no, she never talked about seeing ghosts or getting messages from the beyond or anything.
What was school like for you?
School. Boring really. I didn't particularly like school. I wish I'd done better. I could have done better but I didn't have enough confidence. I just thought I couldn't do it and therefore I didn't. You just muddled along. When I was doing my CSE's, as it was when I was young, they asked me what I wanted to do, and one of them was music. But then I couldn't do music because there was only me and another girl wanted to do it. So I did Commercial Maths instead. That's really like music isn't it. If I'd done music maybe I would have done better. I've always liked needle work, and I got the best results. I nearly got a grade one. Just missed out on a grade one in needle work. I didn't do very well in English. I didn't really do very well in anything particularly. I wasn't a dunce, but cause I was big, cause I've always been big, I got taunted.
That knocks your confidence then, doesn't it.
Yeah. I didn't really have a lot of confidence when I was at school. It's not until you get older you think, ‘Actually, I'm as good as anybody else’. I could have done better, but there's nothing you can do about it now.
When you're younger you don't think like that, do you? You just go on to something else.
Well that's it. I hope it's better now then it was then. If I'd have kicked up a fuss, but then that wasn't me to kick up a fuss. If I'd have said 'Look I want to do music regardless, I have a right to do music. I want to music'. But I didn't you see.
Who were your friends at school?
There was a group of us. We had the Crouches that used to live down the road. We used to play with them when we were at junior school. And then secondary school we moved houses. When I was younger we were in East Stockwith, and then we moved to Morton, which was a bit nearer to town. I had a friend who used to live across the road, Susan Spindley, she's now Susan Smeach. A big family. I think she's one of seven. So I got friends with her, which I still am. And Sylvia Cammock, she used to live at Heapom, way out of town. She used to have to get a bus into school. And Linda Turner.
Did you have a least favourite teacher?
Well the headmaster, Mr Underhill, we used to call him gut rot. I don't know why we used to call him gut rot, but it sort of stuck. He was a bit pompous. He used to walk with his nose up in the air. But I think if I met him now I'm sure he'd be a very nice person. I didn't like the PE teacher because she made me do PE, and I didn't like PE. And I was chubby so she'd think ‘Get moving'.
Do you think teachers were different back then to how they are now?
They've got the internet. They're more aware of different problems that you have, like autism. I don't think that was probably picked up on when I was at school. You used to have a remedial class for the slow learners, well they probably had autism and other problems. Or maybe they couldn't hear or see very well. They're more aware then they were. It's still a tough job to do.
What did you do in your spare time?
Well we used to go round each other's houses, us mates. And go to the pictures sometimes. We didn't do a lot really. And when I was 14, I joined the operatic society. Lynda had joined the year before and that was about the best thing I ever did really was join the operatic society.
Did some of your friends join with you?
No. No. No, nobody. See, singing is one of them things. When I used to live at Church Warsop, I walked to school with you or Joanne or whoever. And I'd walk back with some of the mums and I'd say 'Oh I'm going out tonight', and they'd say 'Oh what are you doing?', and I'd say 'I'm going singing'. That would be the end of the conversation. They didn't know what to say. Only one person ever said, 'Oh what are you singing?' It wasn't a thing that was done. They didn't know what to say cause they'd never heard of it before.
Growing up who inspired you the most?
I suppose Mrs Hughson who was the junior teacher playing the piano really. She inspired me to learn the piano.
What amazes you most about society nowadays?
That's a tough question! Texting. Where you can send somebody a text and then they say 'Oh well I didn't get it till later on'. Well where's it been then? Has it been floating around? Where is it before they get it? Say they switch their phone off, and three hours later they switch it on and then the text arrives. Well where's it been before it gets to the phone? Technology amazes me. Television. The way they can send pictures as a matter of dots and they whiz across the screen that fast it forms a picture. That amazes me. Anything electrical amazes me.
If you had to do it all over again, what would you do differently?
Well I'd get a better career then I did. Not that I had a career. I would believe in myself more then I did. Believe that I could do it cause if you tell yourself you can't do it, then you won't. You'll never do it. It's true what they say. If you believe you can't do it then you won't. You've got to convince yourself first before you can convince anybody else that you can do it. It's a bit scary, but just go with it. I look at people reading the news or being a reporter, when they first started they must have been petrified.
What do you miss most about the old days?
The people we've lost.
Looking back on your life thus far, what are you most proud of?
Well you three of course. That you've survived childhood and that you're enjoying your life. That you've turned out well and that you're happy in your life, and you're trying to better yourselves and everything. It's all you can ask really. I'm glad that I'm still here. I haven't popped my clogs yet. That I'm still sane and a lot of that's down to music. Cause it's a form of exercise, breathing exercise. Even if you don't sing anywhere, you should always sing. Even if it's in the shower or the bath, whatever. You should just have a sing.
What did you discover in the last decade or two that you wish you'd discovered sooner?
John.
Favourite place you have lived.
Well, I think it's got to be here really. This is the best. It's got a lovely view, it's got everything this house really. Sycamore Street was nice. That was a nice house. I used to like Sycamore Street. Between here and there, I mean there's a lot of memories in Sycamore Street, this is a nice house, this'll have lots of memories.
What advice would you give your 40 year old self?
Stop feeling sorry for yourself, and get some training done of some sort and better yourself probably. Instead of just moping around, woe is me, doesn't get you anywhere. Just anything really, even if it's just taking a singing course on or doing more singing, get my voice trained or something like that. That's probably what I'd say.
Is there anything you'd wish you spent less time doing?
Yeah. Chasing fellas really. Thinking that's what life's all about, you must have a fella. You can survive quite well on your own without a fella.
Did you have any big fights with your mum and dad growing up? And if so, what were they usually about?
I know once my dad wouldn't let me out for some reason. I was a teenager going out with my mates. So I went up the stairs, and I called him a bastard. Well that's death. So I raced up the stairs, went in the bedroom and I opened the front bedroom window. I was going to jump out. He came in the door and he saw me. I don't think he said anything, and he just went. It was never spoken of after that. He never mentioned it.
He didn't have to mention it.
No. My dad you see, he'd just give you the look. So if you said something out of turn or whatever he'd just give you the look. He wouldn't say anything, he'd just look at you. And you knew then to shut up or else. Or he used to give us the strap when we were young.
If you could have any job in the world what would it be?
I don't know. Any job in the world? An opera singer. You get paid for singing, that would be the best. You get loads of flowers, and loads of money and lovely beautiful costumes.
What kinds of things get you angry?
When I bang my head. That's a silly thing. When I bang my head, for a while it would make me so angry, and then I would start crying. It's just the way your brain is I think.
Litter louts make me angry. There's bins everywhere, there's no need to chuck it on the floor. If you've brought up properly you wouldn't do it.
People who buy scratch cards, cause I'm on the kiosk. People who buy scratch cards go off, scratch it, bring it back. They've won £2. 'Can I have another one?' Take it, scratch it off, come back. 'Can I have another one?' They do it until they get one where they don't win anything. That is annoying. It's only cause when I buy one I can't win a bean.
Terrorists and all that make me angry. Needless violence makes me angry. Killing for the sake of it, for no reason whatsoever. People who are starving, dying of starvation. People are chucking food away in this country and other countries, well off countries, and they're starving. That makes me angry. Today, society, there should not be anybody dying of starvation or thirst. Some countries are poorer than others, some people are poorer than others, that's the way of life, but they are so poor that they're starving. It shouldn't be in this days and age. It shouldn't be even mentioned, starvation, or lack of thirst or being bombed out your home. It shouldn't be. Yeah, some people are still very poor but they're still making enough to eat.
Litter louts make me angry. There's bins everywhere, there's no need to chuck it on the floor. If you've brought up properly you wouldn't do it.
People who buy scratch cards, cause I'm on the kiosk. People who buy scratch cards go off, scratch it, bring it back. They've won £2. 'Can I have another one?' Take it, scratch it off, come back. 'Can I have another one?' They do it until they get one where they don't win anything. That is annoying. It's only cause when I buy one I can't win a bean.
Terrorists and all that make me angry. Needless violence makes me angry. Killing for the sake of it, for no reason whatsoever. People who are starving, dying of starvation. People are chucking food away in this country and other countries, well off countries, and they're starving. That makes me angry. Today, society, there should not be anybody dying of starvation or thirst. Some countries are poorer than others, some people are poorer than others, that's the way of life, but they are so poor that they're starving. It shouldn't be in this days and age. It shouldn't be even mentioned, starvation, or lack of thirst or being bombed out your home. It shouldn't be. Yeah, some people are still very poor but they're still making enough to eat.
Do you think we should know details of political people's lives like the prime minister?
Well personally no. I mean what good would it do to me if I knew his personal details? And the people, if everybody knew it, the people would just take that and use it against him. Either injure him or his family, or somebody, cause there's always them sort of people about. I mean the people that should know, already know I'd imagine. But such as us, we don't need to know any details really. I think you can know too much. I'm sure there's things that are happening that we don't know about. There is a higher archy somewhere. There's things that going off which we wouldn't be allowed to know. If we did know we'd all start panicking. There'd be a mass panic everywhere.
How much does a person need to have a good life?
You just need the basics. A hundred years ago, two hundred years ago, how did they manage? They didn't even have electricity. They still managed. You need shelter and warmth. You need food and you need water. You need companionship, and a bed would be handy, and a fridge and a cooker. But you know, there's no need to have a telly in every room, everybody's got a computer. They managed for years without it. You don't need it. It's nice to have, but you don't need it at all.
Did you want a marriage like the one your parents had?
Well yes. Your gonna start me crying again aren't you?
If you can have half of what they had then it's good isn't it?
Well yes. That's a sore point with me really. I envy people who married in their twenties or thirties and stayed married until their death. I think that's a wonderful thing. It didn't work out for me. But I do think it's a wonderful thing to be together for your whole life. You deal with life as it comes and it doesn't always work out that way. There's nothing you can do about it. Just do your best.
Do you think there should be a death penalty for murder or should the worse possible punishment be life in prison?
No, I think there should be a death penalty. If you purposely go out and murder people, like terrorists, if you've planted a bomb, or you purposely drive a lorry into a market place with people. What other motive are you doing? If say you've fallen out with somebody in an argument and you strike somebody and you kill them, then you don't necessarily mean to kill them. If you're having an argument and it just gets out of hand and you punch somebody and you punch them in the wrong place and it kills them, then no, that's manslaughter and you didn't mean to kill them. It wasn't premeditated. But when you drive a lorry into a market place of people, then you know somebody's going to die. You know it. It's doesn't need rocket science to work that out does it? So on things like that, yeah.
There are two kinds of weddings, big fancy ones and small private ones, which do you like?
Well I like both. Personally for myself, probably a smaller one. But there's nothing wrong with big weddings. It depends how big your family is, that's the thing isn't it? If you've got loads of family and friends, and you've got loads of money, then you can have a big wedding. Either way.
When you were younger did you ever drink too much and get sick?
Oh yes. Oh yes. I don't like getting sick. I've never got to the point where I've passed out, but I've got to the point where I've come home and been sick in the toilet, or sick all over the floor and had to clean it up. I can't really hold my drink really and I don't like the room spinning, it's horrible. So I don't drink a lot now cause it's horrible.
What is your all time favourite movie?
Rear Window. And Independence Day. But also Murder by Decree, that's a good film. I like Men in Black as well, I think that's brilliant. I like a few friendly monsters.
Do you think people are born intelligent or can they be made intelligent?
I think they're born intelligent. I think you're born with intelligence and if it's not brought out as you go through life then you probably lose some intelligence, if you're not stimulated into doing things. So I think you are, you're born with potential of doing whatever you want to do, unless you've got some kind of disability or something. You know, some mental disability. But yeah, I think everybody's got a fair chance of doing what they want to do.
What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you?
One of the embarrassing things, at secondary school, I was having a lesson about cleanliness and hygiene and all this. One of the times I put my hand up which I shouldn't have done, you see, that's probably the reason I never put my hand up after that. The teacher asked everybody 'How often should you change your underwear?' Well we always used to have clean underwear everyday, but in my logic at that time I thought 'If say that they'll think I'm mucky, having to change them everyday'. So I said 'Every other day'. So then the teacher says 'Oh no you should change them everyday'. So all the boys go 'Ewwww' to me thinking I'm mucky. So it backfired you see. That's one embarrassing thing. I haven't walked down the street naked or anything like that.
What really gives you the creeps?
Smelly men. Somebody with bad teeth, when they're talking to you and they've got bad breath. Somebody that stares at you.
What kinds of things did your mum and dad do, that you've tried to do differently with us?
I think I've just tried to do what they did really. I had a good upbringing. I think I shouted at Joanne and Richard when I was younger more than I should have done. Just a matter of getting frustration out. Probably cause their dad wasn't a help either. So I probably took my frustration out on them. But my mum and dad, I don't remember them raising their voices at all. I don't remember them ever shouting. When we wouldn't get out of bed my mum used to shout upon the stairs, 'You're gonna be late! Again!' She used to shout up the stairs. That's the only time she used to shout, in the morning to get us out of bed.
What are the three happiest moments in your life so far? And you can exclude us three if we happen to be one of them.
Well yeah, having you three. Meeting John. Passing my test and probably having a part in the pantomime.
And you're lucky I can't get that on my blog, cause if I could it would be on there.
Oh me dressed as the troll. Character part. Blacked out teeth and long finger nails.
One last question. If you could say anything to someone who's wanting to do something with their life, what would your advice be?
Give it a go. Cause life's too short to be thinking about it for ten years, and if you've got the resources to do it, and the ability, or even if you don't think you've got the whole ability, then just give it a go. Give it a try. You spend all your life thinking 'Oh I'd like to do that, I don't know whether I should', the time's gone. Give it a go. If you've given it as go and it didn't work out then at least you can say 'Well I tried that and it didn't work'. Then you'll probably look on it and think 'If only I did it this way', and then you go a different direction. But if you don't do anything then you don't know do you? You don't know what you're capable of unless you try. Find out how you go about it, find out what qualifications you need and just go for it. Steer in that direction. Just go for it. It's no good being in a home when you're seventy thinking 'Well I always fancied having a go at that but I never did'. It's too late then. I suppose it depends how fit you are at seventy, if you're still fit have a go at it. You're never too old to try anything.
Thanks very much to my mum for being my first interviewee!
Thanks very much to my mum for being my first interviewee!
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